From:
South Of Jewfish Creek
Friday, 8:16 a.m.
September 12, 2003


Dear Friend & Subscriber,

I have made a decision that makes me a little sick to my stomach.

Actually, it's a decision that may very well work seriously in your favor. But, it goes against my grain. I am a natural born promoter. And, when I promote something I like to do it BIG TIME! If it's family crests I like to sell them like they have never been sold before.

If it's Tova Cosmetics, I love to be the guy who can take it from minus $20,000.00 per month to a profit of $800,000.00 per month in less than half a year. If it's a diet product, I like to hustle it so hard the owner calls me crying about how the hell is he going to fill all these orders. A guy did that once and, I replied...

"Hey Pal, That's The Kind
Of Problems I Create,
NOT The Kind I Solve!"

But, right now, I'm in a situation where I have to more or less "mute" myself.

You see, Theresa Forti has been my assistant for 14 years. She is the person who makes my life work. Without her, I would drown in a sea of details that would leave me no time to eat, sleep, or go to the bathroom.

Well, as it turns out, she can't be at my October Internet/Website Seminar. And, although it sounds silly, if she's not going to be there, I am afraid to make it a big BLOWOUT seminar. If I do, people will make routine requests of me that will leave me paralyzed. I won't be able to say (as I have for 14 years) "Hey, Theresa, this guy needs blank blank blank. Please take care of him."

Okay, I'm no prophet... but... it looks like Theresa's father has a very realistic chance of passing on to a better life at about the exact time I am holding the October Internet/Website Seminar.

So, she and I have agreed I will have to do this one without her help... and... you have no idea how much that scares me. My ability to handle details is approximately the same as a pig's to solve geometry problems. Hence, I have decided not to go all out in the promotion of this seminar and have several hundred attendees as I had planned. I was going to have the seminar at the Marriott Airport Hotel on LeJeune Road. I canceled that arrangement and now, the seminar is going to be at a more intimate hotel called...

Embassy Suites
3974 NW River Dr
Miami, FL 33142

It has a much smaller conference room and thus, we are strictly limited to a small number of attendees. But, there's no way we are going second class. Everyone gets a free breakfast (cooked to order) free cocktails from 6:30 pm to 7:30 pm, a free shuttle to and from the airport, free use of the hotel gym, and a free copy (hot damn!) of USA Today! We might be going smaller, but, we ARE going first-class.

Anyway, before I go on, I need to switch to another subject. Recently, I sent an e-mail to everyone on my announcement list and said... "If you will recommend my newsletter to five other people (and carbon copy me on the e-mails)... I will... provide you with a free report titled"...

The Three Biggest Secrets
Of Making Huge Website Profits!

Guess what?! So many people recommended me to so many other people... that... when they tried to cc me, my mailbox was almost always...

100% Full!

So, in case anyone got short-changed, I am (at the end of this letter) going to give you a hyperlink you can click on to get the free report. When you read it (if you haven't already) you will learn the most valuable thing ever discovered about increasing website sales... and... get a glimpse why this website seminar is going to make other website seminars look...

Totally Pathetic!

The number of the hotel is (305)634-5000 and, they want everyone who is going to register to do so by the 21st of this month. And, since everything is changing, I'm going to change one of the rules myself.

Forget what I wrote earlier about calling a recorded message. My last letter seems to have panicked a few of the phony website gurus. In fact, I think at least two of them need some serious professional therapy. So, there are a few people...

I Don't Want
At The Seminar!

In any case, here's the new rule: If you want to attend, you have to talk with me for a few minutes first. Don't worry, I won't bite. I just don't want any negative, moronic people to be there because...

They Tend To Dull
The Charisma Of The Room!

Plus, there is a new wrinkle to the seminar. Since I'm being forced to restrain myself in the promotion of this seminar (thus, far fewer attendees) I am going to (right before your eyes)...

Write A Website Free
For Several Of The Attendees!

Here's what I suggest you do: If you haven't read the report titled "The Three Biggest Secrets Of Making Huge Website Profits" please click on the hyperlink (in blue) at the bottom of the page and read the report. After that, IMMEDIATELY send an e-mail to...

NoSexGary@aol.com

...which says something like, "Gary I think I might like to attend your seminar. Here are my phone numbers and the best time to call me."

That's it. I will return your call as soon as humanly possible. We'll have a pleasant talk and decide jointly if attending the seminar would be a good thing for you to do or not. (Please do this again even if you've already sent me your telephone information. Without Theresa, the chances are good I've lost your information anyway.)

But, don't wait. Many people (including myself) often wait until almost the date of the seminar before they sign up to attend. That won't work this time. The hotel insists we give them the name of EVERYONE who will be at the seminar by the 21st of this month.

Actually, you will get more by attending a small, intimate seminar like this... than... a much bigger seminar. But, not me. I will get LESS. And, you know what the worst part of it is?

Nobody Cares!

  Sincerely,
 
 

Gary C. Halbert
"All Alone In The
Cold Cruel World Without
His Irreplaceable
Assistant, Theresa"

P.S.

To read my free report, "The Three Biggest Secrets Of Making Huge Website Profits", click here.

Please (if you haven't already) read the report and e-mail me your phone numbers with the best time to call as fast as you can. And, if you decide not to do that, please say a prayer for Theresa and her father. (Actually, that came out wrong. I should have said, please offer up a prayer for them no matter what you decide to do.)

Peace.

Click here to leave your telephone numbers and the best time to call you.

Copyright 2003 Gary C. Halbert.  All Rights Reserved.