North of Jewfish Creek


Dear Friend & Subscriber,

This will truly be one of the most ENLIGHTENING newsletters you will ever read.

This will truly be one of the most TIME SENSITIVE newsletters you will ever read.

And believe me... if you don't "get it" from this newsletter... you never will.

Follow Along As I Tell You A Little Story...

Once upon a time in a land far, far away lived a fair maiden who worked for an ogre copywriter. She was rather shy and delicate. She always dreamt of taking that giant step of having her own business and of WRITING HER OWN SALES LETTERS... but alas... this fair maiden was just too unsure of herself.

But one day her ogre of a boss said to her, "Fair maiden, my brain is frazzled. I need you to write an issue of my newsletter for me."

 "Oh no!" pleaded the fair maiden. "I am but a fair maiden and NOT a copywriter! I simply type the wonderful words you write... I can't possibly write the words myself!"

"Dear, dear, fair maiden," the ogre replied, "it will be all right. I just need to get my creative juices flowing. If you write something... anything... it'll be the battery charger my brain needs to get going. Don't take it so seriously. Just give me something... anything... to ignite my brain."

And so the fair maiden sat at her wooden table and with paper and quill pen in hand...

She Began To Write!

When the fair maiden finished her writing assignment, she gave it to the ogre to read. While she sat there holding her breath, the ogre read the entire newsletter. Then he read it a second time.

The ogre took the newsletter to another servant who didn't know the fair maiden had written it. The ogre asked this servant, "I know I'm your boss but I need you to tell me what you think about this newsletter. Don't butter me up or anything. Give it to me straight. No matter how bad you think it is, lay it on the line."

The servant replied honestly, "I don't see where it's any different than your other newsletters. It's your great writing as always."

And with that, the fair maiden's newsletter was published.

For a number of years, this fair maiden wrote newsletters and sales letters and order coupons. But she did it all within her own "comfort zone"... that of ghost writing under her ogre's name and reputation.

Is there a moral to this story? You betcha there is!

No Matter How Inexperienced

You Are At Writing...

You CAN Do It!

The "fair maiden" I've been referring to in this newsletter is none other than "My #1 Trusty Assistant Theresa".

She's drafted a number of sales letters for me over the years.

She's penned and formatted many an order coupon for me (and for some of my clients) over the years.

She's written a number of newsletters for me over the years.

Remember I told you at the beginning of this newsletter it would be ENLIGHTENING? Even though the words were written in a "fairy tale" tone... the words and story are true. If a fair maiden who has no desire to be a copywriter can write sales letters and order coupons and newsletters... than it just goes to prove... YOU CAN DO IT TOO!

And remember I told you at the beginning of this newsletter it would be TIME SENSITIVE? Well, this fair maiden has gone and gotten herself "hitched" (married) and... after 17-years of working with me... she's abandoning me!

Theresa's last day is only two days away (Friday, December 23, 2005) and I think it would be an amazing farewell if all of my newsletter readers told her how she's been an inspiration to them... or how she's helped them at one of my seminars... or how she's bent over backwards to get one of my products to them... or the most important one of all...

How She'll Miss

Working For The Ogre

Sir Gary Of Halbert!

Since I've only given you a few days to do this, you can send your "good-bye" greetings to her by fax at 352/861-1665 or by email to



Gary Halbert

The "Ogre" Himself



P.S. If you think I'm joking about the writing capabilities of Theresa and you want to see it for yourself, then you need to send an email to me at In the "Subject Line" of your email write "Fair Maiden's Writing". I'll send you a PDF file (you'll need Adobe Acrobat) to download and read. You won't believe your eyes.




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Copyright 2005 Gary C. Halbert.  All Rights Reserved.